I give thanks

I wrote this last Saturday but I wanted to share it hopefully to encourage, but also for accountability. I know there will be times when I will want to complain and times that will be emotionally tough. I know those days will come, of that I have no doubt, but I want to be prepared. I want to have something to look back on, something to remind me of His faithfulness that will help me to trust that He can and will continue to be faithful as He is faithful now.

As I sit here this morning, it’s raining outside, it’s fairly quiet in the hall, I have nothing pressing to do. On some days, a time like this might drive me crazy. So often I feel as though I should be doing something; and if I’m not, I feel guilty and lazy for it. But I don’t today. In the stillness and in the quietness of this time, I give thanks. Thanks that He has brought me here. I write this now so that I will be reminded, on days when I just want a good friend to be with, or when I want to get in my car and drive to the store, or sit at Starbucks and read, or go see a movie, and “thanks” is not the first word that comes to mind. Now that God’s hand of providence is fresh on my mind, I give thanks. Now that I feel truly grateful to be in this place, and nowhere else, I give thanks.

“Remembering is an act of thanksgiving, a way of thanksgiving; this turn of the heart over time’s shoulder to see all the long way His arms have carried…remembering with thanks is what causes us to trust- to really believe.”  

One Thousand Gifts

On a separate note…

I hailed my first taxi today! It’s funny how the seemingly small things at home become such huge things when you are in a place that is so unfamiliar (not that I hailed any taxis at home, but if I did, I would at least have the assurance of being able to communicate with the taxi driver). I had lunch today with a girl I met at the Joy language school last week when I went to observe a class. She is from Oregon and has been here a little over two years. We went to a little café that served great coffee and homemade cheesecake. She brought along two of the other foreign teachers.  I made a comment to her about the staring (which I made reference to in a previous post) and she said it actually gets more aggravating the longer you are here because there comes a point where not only do you see them staring, but you also begin to understand what they are saying. I guess until I get to that point I will live in ignorant bliss.

After lunch, we walked to Wancheng Park (where the other little coffee shop was that I went to last week) and I walked around and read for a little while. I ran into our Chinese teacher there, which made this city of 6 million seem a little more familiar. I guess it brings new meaning to the term “one in a million”…only here it would be “one in six million” J

Up on the roof

It's a "double-blogger" Wednesday...I am feeling extra inspired to write this week, so here I am again. Hopefully the internet will hold up long enough to get this posted in a timely manner :)

As I mentioned in my previous post, this was the first week we've had without rain in almost a month. In fact, the weather has been pretty near perfect here this week. Not too cold, not too hot; keep the windows open kind of good. On Tuesday afternoon I decided to spend a little time up on the roof studying. At one point during my time there I looked up and saw a bright blue sky and white puffy clouds. Suddenly, it hit me...the sky was blue! I know at this point you are thinking "so what?" but what you don't know is that I have not seen a blue sky since I arrived in Luoyang. Yes, we've had days without rain, but even on those days there is this grayish-yellowish tint to the sky and even though you know the sun should be shinning, it's more like a low glowing circle in the sky that you can stare at directly without even squinting. So now that you know, you can imagine my excitement when I noticed the sky was blue.

I have been reading this book over the past two months called One Thousand Gifts. In it, the author talks about the importance of giving thanks in all things and for all things. As she passes her days, her eyes are opened to everyday things that she had never really paid attention to before, daily graces that the Father has given to her. It has challenged me to really keep my own eyes open to those things that I may normally count as ordinary and to see them for what they are, gifts from my Father. Over the past month, a few of those gifts have included: waking to the sound of babies crying, walking in bare feet, laughing with new friends, the feeling of home, hearing a familiar voice on the other end of a call, emails, sleeping with the windows open, the way Isaac's eyes disappear when he laughs, a good latte', hearing Fahlin say "Becca", blowing kisses, daisies....I could go on and on, but you get the point. Today, I can add blue skies to my list of gifts. As I talked with my friend Laura on Tuesday evening and I shared with her the joy I had found in my blue sky experience, her response was "you know, we can send you chocolate and coffee, and other things you love, but we can't send you a blue sky." As simple as that may sound, it was a great reminder that this was a gift from the Father, and I thank Him for opening my eyes to see it for what it is. On most days I am fully blind to all the graces surrounding me, but on this occasion, I am thankful that He allowed me to see and appreciate.

I will leave you all with a little song my sweet friend Abbey "rewrote" for me during my move to Maria's. It's an old song by Watermark, and each time I have moved, she has changed the words around to fit my new place and space. Being that it's September, I thought it would be fitting to share...

(I have italicized her inserts to the song)

Well it's sweltering hot September
and the leaves have fallen true in Luoyang
And I do believe I'm still in love with You
Yeah, my scenery keeps changing
and sometimes it's hard to view
But You've let me see so much since I've known You
But I headed to where it seemed like nowhere
You told me You'd come
You told me You'd meet me here

So I've settled here, and that is that
For You to show me who I am
You had to take me to a country I'd never been
And all the things I dreaded most
about the things unseen
Have now become the sweetest part of me
And though I headed to where it seemed like nowhere
I knew You would come,
I knew You would meet me in China


And You were to say,
"Welcome to Maria's
I know you've traveled far
And it's a lot more foreign and isolated here
than what you're used to
And I know, that in the winter time
things aren't what they used to be
So all you really have here now, is Me..."

Our rooftop view at Maria's Big House

Our rooftop haven

I can see clearly now the rain is gone...

It's gonna be a bright, bright, bright, bright sunshiny day!

A walk to the park

Monday I woke up in a bit of a funk. I got up late (to no surprise), was late to class, broke the dryer handle, and burned my eggs...all before noon. It was one of those days where I either wanted to get back in bed and start over, or get back in bed and sleep through to Tuesday. Since our Chinese teacher was not here, I had an afternoon all to myself. It was the first sunny day we had in almost three weeks. Up until then, it had rained non-stop. Dreary, dreary days.

For about a week I had wanted to venture out and walk to a park here in town that Mikey and Mariah had told me about, but hadn't been able to because of the rain. My motive wasn't so much the park but a little coffee shop tucked away in this park. So, after a few minutes of debating whether to take a nap or walk, I decided to walk. The park is about 5 miles away so put on some comfy shoes, grabbed my Ipod, and hit the road.  As I walked past more and more people the closer I got into the city, I was keenly reminded of the fact that I stand out a bit here. The blatant staring can make me quite uncomfortable at times, but I decided I would make the best of it. I waved at some, smiled at others, and when I had had enough, I just focused on the music. I tried to put myself in their shoes and imagine what it would be like to never have seen a foreigner, or very few foreigners. I guess I would stare too. As I began my trek I was thankful that just a day before I had read an article on cars in China. Apparently traffic signals are just a suggestion, so I was extra cautious.  One tip I read in the article was that when crossing the street, to do so in a group. People here aren't so much concerned about hitting one person; it's hitting multiple people that would damage their car, so there truly is safety in numbers here. At least when crossing the street. Thankfully in a city of 6 million, there was always someone waiting to cross the street.

A few wrong turns and an hour and forty minutes later I finally saw it. There is a huge ferris wheel at the park where the coffee shop is located. At each turn, I kept asking God to show me the ferris wheel because I knew I couldn't ask for directions, and I hated to turn back after walking so far. Finally, there it was and I knew I was not far. I arrived at the park, found the quaintest little coffee shop and quickly found out how to order a cappuccino.  After an hour and forty minutes, I believe it was the best cappuccino I have ever had. And for you who know me, you know I would probably walk that distance often for a good cup a coffee :)

Here are a few shots of what I believe will become one of my favorite spots in Luoyang...

Entrance to Wancheng Park

Inside Wancheng

Cafe' on the Lake

Inside cafe'

Bliss...you were worth the walk, my friend

 About 30 minutes later, I was joined by the Martins, who also came to see the park and let the kids run around a bit...

With Lillian in the cafe'

Charlotte's face is priceless...
I have no idea what those red things are

With blond-haired kids in Luoyang,  you can't get too far before the crowds begin to notice! Whereas in the U.S. we tend to rear our kids with "stranger danger" alerts, here it's no strange thing to walk up to a foreign child and take their picture, pinch their cheek, or even try to hold them. I have a lot to learn!

A day in the life

Unfortunately I didn't make the post this week in time for Friday night laundry (although I did do my usual loads on Friday night) but my computer was on the fritz this week and it threw my schedule off a bit.

This week was fairly uneventful, but just what I needed. After the excitement of having a group here, having a new family move in, and still getting over culture shock, an uneventful week was exactly what my overstimulated self needed. One of my goals for this week was to get somewhat of a schedule in place. For those of you who know me well, you know how I thrive off of organization and routine. I felt like my first few weeks were full of me aimlessly wandering around wondering what in the world I was doing. So for those of you who have asked or are interested, here is what a "normal" day might look like for me here...

8:00-11:00 preschool classes
11:00-12:00 planning for preschool
12:00-1:30 lunch/break (...which should be spent studying Chinese...)
1:30-3:00 Chinese lessons on MWF; on T/TH I am teaching English to our Chinese teacher
3:00 on is up for grabs...
this is the time when I try to visit new kids or go play with some familiar ones (like my three little loves in the Peter Pan room), catch up on email, nap, read, laundry, go out to eat...you get the picture :)

In the "uneventfulness" of this week, I did take my first outing alone this weekend. To be totally honest, I was so nervous. Thankfully one of our sweet nurses, Jona, came with me to hail a cab and once I arrived at my destination there was someone there who spoke English. I visited an English language school where Mikey used to work to see if I may like to help out there during some of my free time. It felt so ironic that I felt more fearful traveling across town to get there than I did traveling half-way across the world to come here.

On a different note, I mentioned in my last post about the Martin family moving to Maria's Big House and wanted to take this opportunity to introduce our new family members to you. Dr. Steve and Laura Martin and their family are from Texas but have lived in Beijing for the past year at New Hope. They have 6 kids (ages 6 months to 8 years), so needless to say they have definately added some life to our 6th floor. We, as a staff and individually, are so excited to have them here. Just one more example of God's faithful provision.

Here are a few shots from the week...

Jaelynn and Isaac with their new classmates, John and Lillian

Fahlin and Naomi with their new friend Charlotte

Dinner with the Martin family to celebrate Lillian's 4th birthday

Friday night laundry, first edition

For the past three Friday nights I have found myself doing laundry. I know to most of you that may sound totally lame for a Friday night, but I actually really love doing laundry. I love the sorting, the folding, and most of all the smell of clean sheets when I go to bed. After a full week, the laundry room on a Friday night is somewhat of a haven, a time to slow down and just wait. As I sit in the laundry room waiting for a load to finish and another to begin, I see all of the little clothes hanging on the lines and it reminds me of the sweet children who wear those clothes. It reminds me of how thankful I am to be living in a place where little feet pitter patter all day, where I constantly hear the sounds of children laughing and crying, and where I am only a short walk away from a good cuddle or hug. A place where I can see the face of my Father in every little smile. One of my favorite places to visit has become the Peter Pan room, right across from our kitchen (which of course I visit frequently...) In this room, I have fallen in love with these three little treasures...

Max

Jay-Ar

Cadence

Since Friday nights seem to have become laundry nights, it seems like a good time to catch up on blogs and re-cap the week for those of you who have been so faithful to read and keep up with life here at Maria's. This week has been full. A good full. We had a sponsor group here all week from the U.S. (the last group of the year), so the week was full of new faces, new names, and sweet time with other brothers and sisters with a like-minded passion to care for these precious children. Katie and McKensey from Show Hope were here. What a gift to be able to see familiar faces half-way around the world and to have a roomate for the week. It was so exciting to see their joy as they discovered a new children each day that they bonded with and to hear their stories each evening as they shared what the Lord was doing in our midst. The week also included a trip to the Old Town (including some fantastic food) and a roof-top cook-out on their last night here (I can tell my appetite has definately come back, as much of my excitement seems to revolve around food!) I found myself really sad this morning as they pulled away, but at the same time I remain ever grateful that I don't have to leave this place. That I GET to stay here. I GET to be here; that I don't have to say goodbye to these children, at least not for a long time.

Along with the group being here this week, we have a wonderful new addition to our family here at MBHOH. Dr. Steve Martin and his wife Laura have just joined our family here, along with their six children. They have moved into the apartment down the hall from me and we are all so excited to have them here.

On a totally separate note, I wanted to share some really FANTASTIC news I received this week. It came in the form of an early Christmas gift (well, not the gift itself, but news of a gift to come). Earlier this week I received and email from my friend Laura Swann with an attached itinerary for a trip...to China...for Christmas!!! My sweet friend is coming over for 10 days to spend Christmas with me here at Maria's. And it gets better...on her way out, two other friends, Robin Bolin and Leanne Jenkins are planning on coming in so that the four of us can spend some time in Beijing together, then Robin and Leanne will return with me to Luoyang and spend a few days here at Maria's with me. Ahhh! I am so, so excited.

I will leave you with a few pics to recap the week...

Show Hope Sponsor team

Old Town Luoyang

Egg bread. Amazing.

Making a break for it...

Just kidding :)

"This is like a beef treat" -McKensey

Someone's really excited about chopsticks!

MBH nurses, my sweet family away from home

First trip to Wal-Mart...yeah!

....and McDonald's! :)

First day jitters

It has happened like clock work for the past 7 years...

The dreams usually start right around mid-July. Dreams of children running in and out of my classroom completely out of my control. Dreams of kids not listening to a word I say. If you are a teacher, you probably know exactly what I am talking about. Some may call it anxiety, I just like to think it's something that comes with being a teacher. The "back-to-school" dreams (or nightmares might be a little more fitting!)

This year was a little different. I didnt have the dreams, but the fears were still just as real, only totally different. Fear of leaving the place that had become so very familiar with kids that I adore for a place that was totally unfamiliar. The fear of not being able to communicate in the same language as my kids. The fear of caring for their individual physical needs. I felt (and still do feel on many days) totally inadequate. But over all that fear there is a peace. A peace of a certain uncertainty. Certain that this is where He has called me to be and serve and love for as long as He has me here. And a peace that although I am inadequate in my own strength, He is the One who makes me adequate.

So the first day came. My stomach in knots, I got out of bed, got ready, fixed a cup of coffee and walked downstairs (definate plus- I don't have to drive to work!) In the back of my mind I tried to remind myself over and over just to love. That is what He has called me to. Yes, to teach and enrich the lives of His children, but above all things, to love.

Thankfully I remembered very quickly that kids have this way of graciously accepting you and loving you just the way you are. Whether you've got yourself together or not, whether you speak their language or not, whether you look like them or not. A gentle and gracious reminder of how I should view others.

As the week went on, it got a little bit easier as I started to get more comfortable with my sweet new babies. It is a challange for sure, but a welcomed one, knowing it is straight from the hand of a Father who planned this long ago.

Here's a little glimpse into our first week together...
and here's to many more to come! :)

Jessica and Judah

Isaac and Jaelynn

Fahlin and Naomi

Pizza Hut never tasted so good

Well, it probably has tasted so good in the past, but I can honestly say I have never been quite this excited about a trip to Pizza Hut.

Many of you were concerned about and have asked about how I have adjusted to the food here. For those of you who know me, you know Chinese has never been my first choice (or second or third...) when choosing what type of food to eat. I will say though that I have really enjoyed authentic Chinese food. The Chinese have this great way of eating meals (at least in restaurants) where you sit around this large round table with a huge lazy susan in the middle. The host orders for the group and the food comes out "family style." As the food passes, you use your chopsticks to get what you want on your plate. That's where my problem lies...the chopsticks. I have to say that eating with chopsticks is a great way to lose weight, even inadvertantly, especially for people like me who can't quite use them yet. I feel like a kid learning how to hold a pencil all over again. I considered it a great victory the other day when I was able to pick up a squishy mushroom and a slippery slice of papaya. I bought some pink training chopsticks at the market (they have a little guy on the top connecting the two sticks), but Mikey told me they wouldnt sit with me in public if I pulled them out :)

So, back to Pizza Hut tasting so good. Along with learning to pick up food and getting it into my mouth, my appetite has been on the fritz since I arrived in China. I am asleep when it knows to eat, and awake when it's normally used to sleeping (not that your stomach sleeps, but you know what I mean). Sunday night it finally hit me....I was hungry, really hungry. And I really, really wanted pizza. A big, fat, greasy slice of pizza. So we finally made it to Pizza Hut tonight, and it has never tasted so good. Enjoy a few pics of my first Chinese Pizza Hut experience and meet my new "family"...

Jona and Mariah

Heidi, me, and Mikey

By the way, the Pizza Hut menu here also includes smoothies, fries, chicken wings, steak, escargot, squid, and an assortment of desserts, among many other things. I decided to stick with what I know for tonight :) So next time you sit down to eat a slice of pizza, enjoy it. Really enjoy it.